[i] Paavda's [/i] in Queen's Park ..

Its odd, very odd that whenever I decide to blog, its because I see something that stirs up these uncontrollable emotions in me and most often, they are just pangs of separation from home, which simply put, can be termed as homesickness.

Today, as I was walking back from class, at the Hart House Circle, I saw this Indian family. Thats usually not a new sight considering the number of Indians and members from the South Asian Committee study in Toronto. As I walked past them, I saw a young girl of about 8 wearing a Paavda (An Indian skirt worn in Southern India with elegant colours and elaborate work in the borders).. something very similar to what I used to wear for special occasions when I was that age ! Seeing that young girl wear something which to me was my link with the past, a connection had be formed instantly so I slowed down my pace hoping to go and talk to them as they seemed lost and needed a bit help with directions. As I approached them, I think it was her father who called her out in my mother tongue, Telugu, and to me that was just icing on the cake!

The funniest part is, I've never really lived in India, and never had any fascination or attraction for my mother tongue. Infact, I've tried to make sincere attempts to try to unlearn my mother tongue on the pretext of being 'cool'... I remember that when I was in school, me and my telugu friends would never speak in Telugu to each other !! It was not just with us, it was with people of most regions, who were scared of their identity, who basically wanted to fit in.

Today things have changed. Maybe its maturity, maybe its just growth or maybe its just being away from your country for so long that I dont wan't to be one of the many. I want to be unique. I don't want to just fit in like any piece of the puzzle, I wan't to be that piece of puzzle that makes the difference between finishing off the puzzle...

Its odd how things change.. I used to mock my mother when she had come to Toronto because whenever she used to see a Telugu person, her face would light up like a bulb. Today, thats exactly how I feel. I yearn for a familiar voice, I yearn for something I can relate too...

I yearn for bajjis in the rain...
I yearn for sounds of music I'd know...

I yearn for.....

.....home....